trans and cis gendered people at play/sex parties
The following is raunchy talk by genderqueers about wonderful nibbly bits. Trans people can certainly be into sexual exploration and BDSM as much as anyone else and some people use gender play as a form of BDSM.
Trans people may be into genderfuck, (playing with gender signifiers), as much as anyone else (i.e. butch trans women or femme/ faggy trans men). Please think about and allow for complexities. Appearances do not always match the binary pronouns of “he” and “she.” Listen. If in doubt, ask!
• History and Dangers of Exclusion
Trans people are frequently excluded overtly by policies or rules, and more often subtly, for example, people avoiding us, not talking with us, turn- ing their back, avoiding eye contact and conversation, or reacting cold- ly. Please be as inclusive as possible towards all guests.
• Body Parts and Names
Trans people may use a variety of names for parts of their bodies. It’s always okay to ask!
• Using Our Bodies Most trans men have a cock (though it might not look that way to you, or it may be silicon, not flesh) and prefer to use it as a cock. Most trans women have a cunt (though it might not look similar to other cunts, all cunts are unique!) and prefer to use it as one. Sometimes, however, trans men want to be penetrated frontally or anally! this doesn’t have to alter their gender identity. Vice versa for trans women. Both of these situations usually require more trust in the partner.
You can always ask what works for them just as you would for anyone else.
*a person whose gender identity is different from his or her biological sex. Trans does not imply any specific form of sexual orientation; trans people may identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, pansexual, heterosexual or asexual
**Cis refers to those whose gender identity matches their biological sex